TACKLE FEAR OF STARTING A WRITING CAREER
This time I’m hoping to inspire those of you who want to become paid, working writers but lack the courage to start.
One of the main hurdles to overcome when first starting to write is lack of courage, or in other words, FEAR. It can come from 1. lack of faith in oneself, 2. lack of confidence, 3. fearing that you’re not good enough, 4. fear of trying something new, and 5. listening to naysayers who tell you that you can’t succeed because... If this is you, you need a pep talk, and you may have to give it to yourself if there’s no one else around to encourage you. I’ll show you how.
First of all, I’m here to tell you that I faced the same fears when I started. One day I suddenly decided to walk away from the career I had always thought I wanted, but which had burned me out. What to do now, I wondered? Well, I had always been interested in writing, but I lacked knowledge about what to do and how to do it. So I started at square one, the same place some of you are probably occupying right now, by reading books and articles on how to write for publication.
The only positive thing from my past was the confidence-building seminars by motivational speakers that I had attended. They assured me that anything was possible if I would just believe. Certainly, none of those classes were geared toward a career in writing! They did provide the gumption to start over and they gave me belief in myself.
I want to share the type of information that will help you believe in yourself so you can give yourself that pep talk, and become the success I know you can be.
1. First of all, let’s tackle lack of faith in your “self.”
No, this isn’t fear of not being a good writer; this is the fear that holds you back in lots of areas of your life—including fear of speaking in public, fear of walking into a room full of strangers, afraid to take a class because you fear failing. We all have had lots of negative input during our lives: people telling us we’re not good enough, we’re not smart enough, we’re not attractive enough, etc. In my case, there was nothing more ego-shattering than having a younger sister to constantly remind me of my dorkiness. And I had a mother who was never able to achieve her dreams, so she discouraged me from dreaming big so I wouldn’t be disappointed, as she had. Luckily, my extended family of supportive grandparents, aunts and uncles gave me plenty of love, hope and courage to make up for what was missing at home.
If you have always had naysayers around you, it is time to find some new companions. Look for positive, supportive people who lift your spirits, and spend your spare time with them. And no, don’t ban the naysayers from your life. I learned to ignore my sister and mother when they provided negative feedback. Mainly, I learned to persevere, no matter what. The friends I made were young and full of hopes and dreams, like me, and I went to work for a wonderful, loving boss who provided lots of unexpected opportunities that helped build my confidence. I developed my own cheering team, and I found myself spending more time with them than at home.
You can find a cheering team, too. If they’re not at home, develop positive friendships at school, at church, by volunteering, or by getting a job in a positive atmosphere.
2. Lack of confidence is a more elusive obstacle to success than lack of faith in yourself.
Sometimes, people who aren’t confident can be clueless to how they’re perceived by other people, which is really a reflection of how they feel inside. You’ve seen people who always look down, who always hang back in any gathering, who speak very timidly. Timid people are not going to be willing to put themselves or their writing out there. How can you overcome being a shy, timid person?
Here is the number one trick to building more confidence. When you get up in the morning and get dressed, face the mirror and tell yourself: I am a happy, confident person. I am a talented writer. People want to pay me for my writing. I am a successful writer. You can start with one or two of the above statements, or go through the entire list, or adapt the sayings to fit your needs. The important thing is to repeat affirmations over and over to yourself as you look in the mirror. Write them down and tape them to your mirror so you can’t miss them. By doing this over and over, day after day, you’ll eventually manifest what you say. You may not believe this now—I certainly didn’t at the beginning. But I did it, and it really works.
You’ll soon notice that your confidence is growing in all areas. I was told by experts that “you have to believe to achieve.” Positive affirmations like those above have helped many people I’ve known to succeed in their various pursuits, and they have definitely helped me overcome the obstacles in my life.
3. Fearing that you’re not good enough is a common obstacle to new writers.
But then, not one writer in the world has ever known if they were good enough until they’ve tried. Overcome fear of trying something new and having naysayers tell you that you can’t succeed. Get up every day and writing something, whether in your journal, a letter to a friend, or about a life experience that you want to put on paper. Just as practicing positive affirmations to a mirror makes it real, so does practicing writing. It’s the practice that makes it so. And take a class in writing—it doesn’t matter what type of writing. There are classes available that teach any skill you might feel you lack. You’ll learn that fear is just a four-letter word that doesn’t mean anything.
4. The same goes for fear of trying something new.
Fear is fear, and the only way to overcome it is to try, and keep trying until you get it right. No one does it right the first time, but if everyone let fear hold them back, we wouldn’t have champion athletes, or polished entertainers, or even a president.
5. The final thing is: ignore what the naysayers say to you.
People often try to discourage others if they, themselves, lack confidence. And sometimes they simply don’t want to lose the person they’ve always known, and fear you might change if you become successful. Their fear is not your fear, so don’t let them stop you or even slow you down.
If someone tells you that you can’t do something, you can do any one of several things. Put your fingers in your ears if you really want to discourage them. Okay, that sometimes worked with my younger sister, but it was easier to start humming a happy little tune and walk away. I could hum really loud.
You can also be forthright and simply tell the person that their words hurt you, and that you can’t continue to spend time with them if they can’t be more supportive. That takes guts if you’re timid and lack self-confidence, but believe me, just saying it will help you build confidence. Don’t second-guess your decision and feel bad because you might have hurt their feelings. It’s your survival vs. their barbs, and self-preservation makes it imperative that you act in your own self-interest.
There is one more thing that stops people from realizing their dreams. Many people say they’re waiting until their kids go to school, then it’s off to college, and then they can’t do it because they have to help take care of a sick parent or spouse. Then one day, they decide it is too late.
It is never too late to start a writing career. You might have to scale back your dreams of achieving great financial success because you lack the stamina to sit at a keyboard all day, or you might not feel up to doing the work necessary to build a successful business writing career, but you can still become a best-selling author, or a prize-winning writer, or a prolific writer of magazine articles, or reach any number of other goals. I personally know many writers in their seventies and eighties who wouldn’t think of retiring because they’re enjoying themselves too much. Your career as a writer at any age depends on your motivation, and that is something that you never lose once you’ve acquired it. Affirmations, affirmations, affirmations.
I can remember reading “The Power of Positive Thinking,” among several other motivational books, and listening to a talk by Mark Victor Hansen before he became famous for his “Chicken Soup for the Soul” books. I believe that back then, his talks may have been self-motivational as well as motivational for his audience, and that may be why he was able to become such a successful writer. Reading books about positive thinking always inspire me when I’m down, even now.
Affirmations are the one most important thing you must do to motivate yourself to move forward. I am positive that all of you have within you the talent to become paid writers. I’ve known people who became successful writers even though they never got past grammar school. There are people who worked as janitors, cooks, assembly line workers, and a myriad of other backgrounds who have become successful authors. And I’ve seen writing examples from some of you—some of them even appeared in “Looking Back,” so I know the talent that lies hidden in you.
If anyone can do it, you can do it!
